Peace, love and a 24"waist

Sounds perfect to me! So I picked up this book by Deborah Low Peace, love and a 24" waist. No no silly I didn't buy it, I actually made it to the library and borrowed it. I am done buying those dang books and wasting money! So I made it through the first couple of chapters and she asks some tough questions to open your eyes to evaluate how badly you are discriminating against yourself. Here are my questions/answers be nice this was brutal!

Do you often look in the mirror and cringe at your appearance? Yes. I have mentioned before that I will avoid the mirror for as long as I can. The last time I looked in the mirror and felt good was when I was pregnant. It's been 7 months since I gave birth.

When you encounter more fit or lean individuals do you feel inferior or envious? Yes. But I cover with humor and sarcasm. You guys can't tell can you? or can you?

If there were less of you, would you be more loved? No. I am so very loved by my husband, daughter and family. I don't know that I could be anymore loved. It's all about how I feel about myself, not how they feel about me.

Do you avoid certain social situations that may draw attention to your body?  Sometimes. I try to make excuses and I always change my outfit several times.

Do you associate your level of happiness with your weight? Yes. Even though I know I am loved, I often think if my clothes fit better I would be happier. Sometimes I think if I just left the house and became more social I would be happier and that would lead to weight loss but then I get dressed and nothing fits so I stay home.

Do you believe that by losing weight your life will become perfect?  Sometimes. I know it won't fix everything (the ex wife will always be there lol)

Do you feel that you will never be satisfied with you body? Yes! I have been before, many times. I know that I am not a stick thin type. I love my curves, I just don't love having curves and bumps where I never have before and is more obvious and unattractive. I loved being a size 8, I want to get back to that!

Deborah Low says "yes" answers reflect the damaging, judging and unloving beliefs that we hold about ourselves. She says this type of harsh self-judgement leaches joy from our lives. I believe it! I have been struggling with this "leaching" of joy since my body took on a life of it's own. I have struggled to balance the joy I have in life with my husband and children and this "leaching"

Well I did it. The first round of tough questions answered! On to the next chapter....